Samantha’s Weblog

Attempting to be serious…..

AshleyMadison.Com November 13, 2007

Filed under: Thoughts on... — milagrosfarias @ 3:42 pm
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I commute to school Monday through Friday. I’m up at 6:30 am and out the door at 6:45 am. Usually I like to listen to Z100 in the morning and usually enjoy the Zmorning zoo. It’s something to listen to even and I enjoy some of the topics they discuss. It can be very emtional like when they get on serious topics like veterans on Veteran day or about September 11th. Most of the time they are talking about random and entertaining tidbits like buying a tazer or the top ten ugliest shoes (uggs were the ugliest…no surprise).

Today, they were talking about these commercials they had seen about this website called AshleyMadison.com. The commercials said,”Are you married? Do you want something more?” with a slogan of “When Monogmy becomes monotonous.” What could they be advertsing? They joked about what they could be advertising, but they knew and agreed that it was a site that advertised cheating. It is specifically aimed at married people.

They went into some detail about how that whatever “services” you purchase from this website will come up as something random so that your spouse will not find out or be suspicous about the charge. For example, instead of saying “Ashleymadison.com” on the bill, it may say “McDonald’s” or something along those lines. This site allows for somone to have an affair and keep it quite.

I listened to there discussion about it until I got to school. I was really disturbed on many different levels. As a girl who has a boyfriend, it bothers me that there is a website that makes it easy for someone to hurt someone in this way. They make it easy for someone to cheat and not be found out. As a christian, it bothers me how society is distorting this sacred bond between a man and a woman, and ultimately with God. Even on another level of a person who has seen the affects of a cheating spouse on the family as a whole.

But this whole discussion on the radio only brought up another feeeling that I have been dealing with about marriage.

As I have said, I’m not single. I have been dating my boyfriend for about 2 years now. It’s been an interesting 2 years, but as of late the whole topic of marriage has gotten to both of us. It seems that everyone expects us to get married. Okay, we both had the idea that if we were going to date, it had to lead ultimately to marriage. Recently, I have been questioning that whole idea of dating.

It seems in our Christian world that if you are dating, you must have marriage in the back of your head. It seems that we focus our relationship in that direction from the beginning. I’m beginning to question this idea. I understand that we should not date with no purpose, but why does the purpose ultimately have to be marriage.

I feel like I’m not making any sense and I have barely begun. It’s just lately I have been feeling that there is to much pressure in our Christian World on dating leading to marriage. How can we fully understand someone with pressure on us? How can we concentrate on having a healthy relationship with this peron and with God when people are constantly on top of you about marriage.

Marriage should be about you, the person, and God. It shouldn’t be about people pushing you or the pressure of being married. If you, that person, and God think it’s time to get married, then get married. Don’t plan out your life around that idea of getting married at a certain time or point in the relationship. It may not be God’s will. God has the perfect timing for everything and I think that we tend to forget that we should just listen to him and not worry about the person we are going to marry.

Dating is tough and tricky, but I don’t think we should frame our relationships around the idea of marriage. It makes things rough.

Trust me on that.

 

5 Responses to “AshleyMadison.Com”

  1. meg Says:

    i recently posted a xanga entry about my thoughts on marriage. and how divorce is not only accepted these days, but joked about. marriage is a commitment. a life long commitment. one you shouldn’t make unless you’re ready to sacrifice everything else for it. because through sickness and health, for better or worse, richer or poorer, TIL DEATH DO YOU PART, you’re making a promise to that person. and it’s a promise that these days, not many people should make, and even less people can keep.
    so i definitely agree with you. at least in this society, marriage is put onto such a high pedastal, and then there are websites like those, and drive through chapels, and divorce lawyers making more money than bill gates. [an exaggeration, i know. but i felt it was necessary.]
    i just think that it’s okay to be in a relationship without getting married.
    sorry if i rambled. i have a lot, a LOT, of opinions on this subject.

  2. Carly Says:

    :) i remember being in your position once…my only advice to you is to be open about everything you are feeling, communicate with words your distaste for the pressure and pushing and make sure that you and he are on the same page with everything in your relationship…if you are, if you are both totally seeking God and following HIm with all your hearts then God will lead you to wherever He wants with your relationship and you will both be ok with it…and dont be afraid to tell people to back off either… :) in a loving way of course, but they dont really have a right to tell you what you should be doing with your lives in that aspect…thats Gods job…they can of course state an opinion, but thats it, and an opinion is one that is only made once and then left alone…if it keeps getting pushed then it starts to become something they want for you, Godly counsel is one thing, but when there is no spiritual basis for some comments then its unecessary… so ask where the BIblical truth is for that statement, or when God first told them that they needed to push you both to get married… ha… lol not rebellious, but your a smart girl and i know that you can figure out the best way to deal with these people in a way that glorifies God…

    lol and as for the original topic of this first blog…i am both shocked and appalled that a website like this would even be allowed…i agree with Meg, marriage is not supposed to be the “thing to do” its a serious life long commitment…not a joke, not a game, and if you aren’t really serious about moving forward in that avenue, at all, it should not even be a thought on your mind, it shouldn’t even be conceived…so yea, enjoy your relationship for where it is right now, its totally ok…premature thoughts on the future only further to complicate life and the bond that you two have with each other right now…so just enjoy what God is doing right now, live in the moment with Him :) and let Him guide your steps….His timing is always perfect…

  3. God Says:

    Marriage is a dying institution. Marriage is not sacred when relatives can marry each other including animals with humans in some states. You are a moron and your BF is probably cheating on you anyways.

    Let me ask you something else. As a Christian woman you must obviously follow the word of the bible which means you are a virgin until marriage correct? If not you are going to hell and burn for eternity! how nice.

  4. Cathy Says:

    Is this “God” person reading the same blog as I did. Seriously bro, wth are u talking about?

    “Let me ask you something else. As a Christian woman you must obviously follow the word of the bible which means you are a virgin until marriage correct? If not you are going to hell and burn for eternity! how nice.”

    She didn’t even mention anything about her being unfaithful or having sex. Now whose mind is in the gutter?

  5. Brandon Smith Says:

    Great post, I wrote a post on this, too.

    This site is just ridiculous..

    Check out my blog:

    http://www.modernmarch.com


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